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Re: Epilogue - Growing up, coming out, getting wet


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Posted by Patrick on January 06, 2023 at 01:11:24

In Reply to: Re: Epilogue - Growing up, coming out, getting wet posted by Zonie on January 05, 2023 at 18:04:04:

You know, I didn't really press for details when he shared that - and we haven't discussed it again since. Since its years in the past at this point, and we're both now adults and our lives are very different for the better. The impression that I got from what he shared with me was that neither he nor his father wanted him at home, and what Willy wanted was to be able to get a job and move into an apartment with people that, you know, weren't sexual predators. I don't think he was allowed to do that without his father's permission, which his father was unwilling to give. I don't think Willy or anyone else had considered any kind of legal action to force his father to take him back in, since neither of them wanted that to happen.

That said, I know nothing of the laws and whatnot in a country I've never even visited before. But I do have a close friend here who is a social worker with the child services agency in our state. And, man oh man, listening to her talk about what she deals with at work every day is enough to shatter your faith in humanity. Even if a law like "felony child abandonment" is technically on the books, it doesn't always mean its consistently enforced. Case workers are very very overwhelmed, often the police will look the other way, or family members might learn how to game the system and make it look like they're complying with the law, when in fact they are not. At least those were some of the thoughts she shared with me when I asked her about this kind of situation, and how it might play out in the US today. I'm not saying its right or wrong, but it does paint a very bleak picture in my mind, and makes me even more grateful that in the long run, everything worked out ok.


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